The Destruction Of The Codes Chapter Four

Last time, we finally got to learn a little more about Lestat, but at the end Leanna had a strange vision of her and Lestat, Kissing. She's not sure what it is, but all she knows is, her mind isn't sure how she's feeling for Lestat now.

I awoke with a startle from the me kiss Lestat scene I'd just dreamed. I'd never kissed Lestat before, and I was in all ways not wanting it to happen, then why had I had a vision of it? Then a realization hit me of what Lestat had said.
You've inherited your fathers brains. That's all the Doctor knows, but if he was to learn of your ability to look into the past, and very occasionally, people's dreams, you can bet that life here will only get worse.
Oh no, what if that vision of Lestat and I wasn't actually a vision, but a dream? If it was, then was it Lestat's, or someone else's, or even my own?

That single kiss haunted my mind for days. Every night, the same dream would play in my mind, and I'd keep dwelling on it. Who's was it? Every night, I found myself more and more wanting to see the dream, and not to figure out who's dream it was, but to just see me be embraced by Lestat. Feelings I'd never felt before kept overcoming me as I'd watch his lips touch mine every time I went to sleep. The longer I watched, the more I thought I could actually feel his lips actually touch me, although whenever I woke up, I found myself alone.
The dream wasn't the only thing I kept seeing. Every night, I would see a vision of Lestat. Each one about the horrible things he'd done for the doctor, and reasons why he'd done them. He'd killed people, brought other people here, and yet, after every job he accomplished, he'd go back to his room, only to cry for the lives he'd destroyed and ended. Some of the time, he was able to find a way to spare someone's life, but the guilt of all those others kept coming on top of him.

After days of thinking of that kiss, my thoughts were put on the shelf as the cell door opened to reveal Lestat, the first time I'd seen him or anyone else since he'd ran out of the room. His eyes were droopy as if he'd just gotten up, and he seemed kind of sluggish in the way he moved. He wasn't wearing his jacket and was bare footed.
"Why are you here?" I asked him as he looked at me. I couldn't tell if he was looking at me like he had in the dreams because of all that black tear mark makeup. If he was, he was sure doing a good job of hiding how he felt.
"The doctor told me to check on you for some reason. He said if I didn't, he would."
Then I had my first non-unconscious flashback. It was of what the doctor had said to Lestat. It almost made me almost scream. It was a very simple, yet terrifying enough to send chills up my back.
Lestat, go check on the older girl. She must be very lonely in that room. Not seeing anyone in a week.
Why are you asking me to go see her? Couldn't you send Selene?
Selene is off with the youngest girl, calming her down still. Letat you will go check on the girl, cause if you don't, I will, and you know what happens when I see young girls like her. It doesn't end well for them. 
Yes doctor, I'll go see her.

"Leanna, are you okay?" He asked me, looking me in the eye as he sat down beside me.
"Huh? Oh, yes, I'm fine. Besides being stuck here and alone, I'm perfectly okay."
I sat up on the bed, looking down at my bare feet. I hated this place already, and I'd only managed to see only one room in person, my own. I hated the doctor, I hated Selene, I hated the minions of the doctor, and most of all, I hated Lestat.
No, I didn't hate Lestat. I just couldn't explain what I was feeling for him. Was it anger, guilt, or something else? I wasn't sure.
Lestat sat on the bed next to me and placed his hand on my forehead, "Are you naturally this warm?"
I touched my forehead, realizing how warm I was, "No, I'm not."
Lestat removed his hand from my forehead. Then he took the sleeve of my sweater and pulled it up some. He placed two of his fingers on my wrist and felt my pulse, "Hmmmm, can you open your mouth for me? I need to check something out."
I wanted to say no, not after seeing that dream of him and I, but all I could manage to do was nod and open my mouth for Lestat to see inside.

He gently held my cheek as he looked at the inside of my mouth. I remained as calm as I could. I'd never let any one get this close to me, ever, "Your throat is a little swollen. Something very common with our type after traveling through a portal. It wouldn't of come up except you haven't been treated all week. Sorry about that. It's my job to make sure everyone here is in good heath," he reached into his pocket and placed a light purple pill in my hand, "It's a caplet with some special herbs that help our kind after we get out of the portals.  They help with headaches, swelling throats, trouble standing up, passing out and most of all, confusion," he winked at me after saying confusion. Did he know something I didn't?
"I don't trust you enough to take this-"

"It's okay, I take it all the time," he took another pill out of his pocket and swallowed it, "In about ten minutes I'll be as I would say, normal. My headache from travelling in the portals from earlier today will be gone and I won't be in a state of mass confusion about certain things I'm thinking," Like me, I thought to myself.
"Well, if you say so," as I swallowed the pill, I noticed something about Lestat's make up around his eyes. I reached out my hand and touched the black underneath his eyes, his eyelids opening wide as he felt my skin touch his. As I touched him, I could see him breathing more heavily, almost as if my hands touching his face weren't something natural for him to feel "It's tattooed on,"

He nodded, his arms starting to shake as I moved my fingers down his cheek. They were so soft, smooth, and delicate, who knew someone so powerful could be so fragile, "Yes... they are..." he stuttered. Was he afraid of me? I didn't think someone like Lestat would be afraid of me. Maybe it wasn't me he was afraid of, but his feelings for me showing.
"Why is that? Do you like having these markings?"
"No..." he was still stuttering, I was starting to think that he really did like me, "I can't stand these things... but the doctor made me get them..."
That might explain why he dreamed of himself without the tattoos, but what about the hair? He had a different hair cut in my dream.
"What about your hair? Do you like having it in that cut?"
His head shook back and forth, "Same reason as before... the doctor made me... said it would make me... more sinister..."
"Why do you do what the doctor says? Are you really that helpless, or is something else keeping you from doing what you want to do?"
"I... I..." he never finished his sentence before he closed his eyes as the tears started to fall. He really was fragile, more than I thought. Maybe I'd pushed him over the line. I hated when I did that. It was kind of a trait I'd taught myself from not having my real parents around.
Maybe I should cheer him up, I thought to myself as I saw Lestat still crying. he didn't seem like a bad guy, only someone who'd been told what to do for too long, an eagle, wanting to spread its wings and fly away from the danger around it.

"Are you okay Lestat?" I finally asked him after thinking of what to say. He opened his eyes to look at me as I said his name, only to turn away as he saw my face, "Lestat, what's wrong?" I reached out to touch his shoulder only to find him stand up and walk away from me.
"Please, don't touch me. I've done so many horrible things to your family, and so many others," He crossed his arms as he leaned his head against the wall across from me, "I don't deserve to even be talking to you, or to have you be sympathetic to me. I don't deserve any of it."

"Lestat, I know you've done some terrible things," he turned his head toward me as I walked over to him. My voice went quiet as I moved toward his ear to speak, "Every vision I've had so far had you in it. I've seen the bad you've done, but I've seen the reasons why you continue. You care about Selene. You don't want the doctor to hurt her. I know you attacked Rygan and from what I saw, your the one who brought my dad into the portals after you knocked Rygan unconscious. They're not the only ones you've affected though."

He nodded, turning his head away from me, only to find me placing my hands on both sides of his head, turning his neck so I could whisper the rest of what I wanted to say, or should I say, ask.
"What is it you dream about Lestat? Is it freedom? Selene's safety? To bet the doctor at his own game?" I stopped for a moment for it to all sink into Lestat's mind before breaking the news to him about how I knew how he felt about me. I dropped my hands from his head for him to turn around and look me in the eyes.
"Leanna... you don't know all the things I've done," he tried to convince me, "You don't deserve to be here. It's my fault you're here. You hear me, my fault. You should be off somewhere pursuing your dreams, not locked up in a cell, wasting your time with-"

"Shhh," I interrupted, cuffing my hands around his head, placing my head against his. It had been ten minutes since I'd taken that pill, and all my confusion from the past week that had been building up, my feeling for Lestat were as clear as a bell. I knew what I was feeling for him, "It's me isn't it? I'm the one you dream of. Just you and me... and this,"

Our lips touched and Lestat forgot about everything he'd been trying to tell me. I'd never kissed anyone before in my life. I'd imagined it as something romantic, but this was beyond anything I'd ever imagined it could be. His grip on me was strong, but not overpowering like I'd thought it would be.  If anything, he was allowing me to be the one to push it as far as I wanted it to go. His lips were gentle, but still compelling to me as his mouth begged for more.

He finally broke away from my mouth, just for a while to tell me how much he cared,"Leanna, I promise I'll get all of you out of here." Then he was back for more.
I wasn't confused about my feelings for Lestat anymore. I knew perfectly how I felt for him. I loved him.